


SPN Coda 15x03 - "The Rupture" (2)

by heylittleangel



Series: Supernatural Codas - Season 15 [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Comfort, M/M, and happier, and they use some, as much as they can be, puts a bandaid on Dean and Cas's forehead, there, they're fixed now, they're okay and together, this one is soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2021-01-03 04:43:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21173624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heylittleangel/pseuds/heylittleangel
Summary: So, I did write a happy coda where I make Dean and Cas talk and be happy 'cause that's all I want. I hope you enjoy this one as well!





	SPN Coda 15x03 - "The Rupture" (2)

**Author's Note:**

> So, I did write a happy coda where I make Dean and Cas talk and be happy 'cause that's all I want. I hope you enjoy this one as well!

After the rift closed, taking all of the ghosts and Rowena along with it, Dean didn’t even know how to feel. He was happy for it to be closed but the price they had to pay was too much, as it always was with things like this. Sam broke down a few seconds after that, dropping to his knees, head buried in his hands, shoulders shaking with the painful sobs that came up his throat.

Dean didn’t think twice before walking towards Sam and kneeling beside him, putting his arms around Sam and pulling him into his chest. Sam didn’t object, only let himself be pulled, burying his face on Dean’s chest, crying silently. Dean tightened his hold on Sam, vague words of comfort falling through his mouth without him realizing. He rested his head on top of Sam’s, holding back tears of his own.

He heard Cas’s footsteps approaching them and Cas knelt by Sam’s other side, putting his arms around the two of them and holding them against his chest. Dean let one of his hands find its way towards Cas’s arm, just resting there as they shared a look; a look filled with silent words, in a language only they could understand; a look filled with regret and fear and love and forgiveness. Dean knew it didn’t mean all was forgotten but it meant they could work it out, as they always did, and that was all he needed at the moment.

They stayed like that, Cas and Dean holding Sam and each other, until Sam’s sobs died down to soft sniffles, and then to shaky breaths. And they only let each other go because Dean and Sam started to shiver with the cold wind that was starting to form in the graveyard, so Cas let them go and stood up first. He helped Dean and then they both helped Sam to stand up on wobbly legs. They each stayed on one of Sam’s side, walking and supporting him as they walked towards the Impala. 

Sam got in the backseat of the car, curling on himself on the small space. Dean’s heart hurt for him and he wanted nothing more than to just take that pain away from him, but he knew he couldn’t; there wasn’t much that could help Sam deal with a pain like that, Dean knew from experience. His eyes went to Cas, who was walking back to the chamber, grabbing stuff on his way. Dean took a deep breath, turning to look at Sam.

“I’m gonna help Cas get the stuff and then we’ll go home, okay?”

Sam didn’t answer, only nodded slightly. Dean tapped his leg with his hand before closing the door and walking in the same direction Cas was. He grabbed the duffel he had left on the ground, putting it on his shoulder, and checking around to make sure he wasn’t forgetting anything. When he got to the chamber, he saw Cas grabbing Rowena’s stuff with extreme care as if they could break in his hands, as if they were the most precious things Cas had ever laid his eyes on.

Dean started to help him, grabbing the Book of the Damned and Rowena’s notes, placing them on the bag Rowena had especially for them. Cas was finishing getting what had left from Rowena’s spell when he hesitated, staring down at the bowl he had in his hands. Dean walked towards him, putting the bag on the floor.

“Are you okay, Cas?”

Cas shook his head, eyes falling closed as he licked his lips. “Why do we always have to pay a high price to save the world? When even the people living in it don’t care enough to do it?”

“Because  _ we _ care enough for everyone, Cas, and it’s our job to do it, don’t you think?”

Cas put the bowl down and raised his head to look at Dean. “It’s a horrible job.”

Dean smiled softly, placing his hand on top of Cas’s. “I know, it sucks and it’s dirty, but we’re the only ones that’ll do it. C’mon, let’s go home.”

Dean started pulling Cas, grabbing the bag on the floor with his other hand. Cas took the other bag and they walked out of the chamber with their hands intertwined, making their way towards the Impala. They put the bags in the trunk and got in the car. Sam seemed to be asleep in the backseat, curled in himself, soft breaths coming out of his mouth.

The drive was silent for the most part, Cas staring through the window as Dean paid attention in the road, trying to keep his mind blank. He didn’t even turn the radio on, something he rarely did.

****

They were getting close to the bunker when Cas turned to him and finally broke the silence, “Dean—”

“Cas,” Dean cut him, “not now, okay?”

Cas frowned at him. “But you don’t even know what I was going to say.”

Dean smiled softly to him. “I know you well enough to have an idea. Just… We’ll talk, I promise, but just, let’s get home, let me take care of Sam and then we can talk, okay? Please.”

“Okay.”

They fell back into silence after that, Cas going back to staring out the window as Dean focused back on the road. It wasn’t long before they got to the bunker, Dean parking Baby in the garage. Cas woke Sam up and helped him get out of the car and walk inside as Dean stayed behind for a little bit. He took a deep breath, throwing his head back to stare at the roof. He had to have his mind in place if he was going to take care of Sam; he  _ needed _ to.

Dean walked into the bunker, making his way up the stairs and went to the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of beer, opening it and almost downing it completely at once. He let his shoulders slump as the alcohol burned his throat; not as strong as he wanted it to, but it was something already. Cas appeared not long after, without his trenchcoat, which was an odd scene for Dean. He arched a brow at Cas, waving his hand at him.

Cas looked at himself. “I… I was uncomfortable with the trenchcoat so I took it off.”

“Yeah, I can imagine that. Where’s Sam?”

“He said he was going to take a shower and I said he should eat something. You two haven’t eaten very well these last few days.”

Dean chuckled humourlessly. “Guess you could say that.” He rubbed his hand on his face and placed the empty bottle on the counter. “Let’s see if I can make anything edible with what we have.”

Cas walked towards him, stopping by his side as Dean re-opened the fridge. “Do you need help?”

“Nah, it’s not like I’m gonna do a whole buffet here, just something for Sam to eat.”

“And you too, Dean.” Dean opened his mouth to argue but Cas cut him off, “You also need to eat, Dean. It’s not healthy and I don’t you to pass out from hunger.”

“I’ll live if I don’t eat but fine.”

Dean fumbled inside the fridge, grabbing whatever he thought it was still good. It didn’t take long before he had some food for him and for Sam. Cas was sitting on the table, arms on top of it as he stared at Dean moving around the kitchen. Dean placed a plate on the table, the other on his hand.

“I’m gonna take this to Sam and then I’ll eat, alright?”

Cas smiled softly at him. “Okay.”

Dean walked out of the kitchen and made his way to Sam’s room. His phone ringed and he fished it out of his pocket to see a text from Stevie, saying that everyone in the town was good and that everything seemed to be back to normal. It lifted a weight out of Dean’s shoulders and he sent her an okay and asked for her to let him know if anything changed. 

He put his phone back in his pocket as he knocked on Sam’s door, getting a low reply from Sam. Dean opened the door to see Sam sitting on his bed, hunched over his legs with his elbows resting on his knees. He saw Sam clean a few tears from his face before turning to face him.

Dean raised the plate on his hand. “Thought you may be hungry.” Sam only nodded, taking the plate from Dean’s hand and staring at it. “How you holdin’ up?”

Sam sniffled before replying, “Any word from Stevie?”

_ Oh, the Winchester style: change the subject and not talk about our feelings. _ “Yeah, she said everyone’s good in the town.”

Sam nodded again, the plate on his hand shaking slightly. Dean took a deep breath, wondering what to say.  _ I’m not the one supposed to talk about the feelings, what the hell am I supposed to say to him when I know there’s little that’ll make his pain go away? _

“Sam, I—”

“I’m fine, Dean.”

“Yeah, I can see how  _ fine _ you are. Just… if you wanna talk, I’m here, you know that, right?”

Sam finally turned to him, just a barely-there smile on his lips. “Thanks, but I’m fine. We won, right? What more could I want?”

Dean sighed, voice heavy, “Yeah, we won.”

They fell in silence after that, Sam back to staring at the plate on his hand. Dean decided to let his brother be, knowing it wouldn’t make much of a difference if he tried to make him talk; it didn’t work on him, why would it work on Sam?

Dean went back to the kitchen, Cas still on the same spot as before, but with his head on his arms this time. He looked so tired and old, that, for the first time since it all started, it dawned on Dean how much Cas could be suffering with all that happened; he lost his son, his dad turned out to be a jerk—though Dean already knew that— and it wasn’t like Dean was being better than Chuck in a few ways.

He sat on the other side of the table and noticed that Cas had his eyes closed, breathing softly, almost as if he was asleep. Dean started to eat, staring at Cas as he did, not really tasting the food, which was something super strange for him, considering he loved food, especially when he cooked. He ate it quickly, pushing the plate aside after that, which seemed to get Cas’s attention. Cas opened his eyes, focusing them on Dean, and straightening his back.

Dean almost got lost as he stared into Cas’s eyes, snapping himself out of it as he cleared his throat. He broke their eye contact, staring at his hands instead. “Cas, I-I know I was a jerk with you these past days and it wasn’t fair to you, I know that. I’m just… I’m  _ so  _ fucking tired, man. To find out Chuck was the one behind everything that we did? As if nothing we’ve done mattered now?”

“Of course it matters, Dean,” Cas’s voice was soft but firm. “Even if Chuck put whatever he wanted in front of us, we still made our own choices, we still chose what we wanted to do. I don—I  _ can’t _ believe Chuck controlled all of our actions, I need to believe we had at least the tiniest hint of free will in the middle of Chuck’s schemes.”

Dean shook his head. “I don’t know, Cas. I actually don’t, I don’t know what to believe right now. It’s so much easier to blame Chuck for all that crap, y’know? Easier than taking the responsibility to myself.”

Cas’s hand found Dean’s, intertwining their fingers. “You can choose to believe in us, Dean, the same as we’ve way always done. We now can choose everything ourselves and we can make everything right, this time. Chuck can’t play with us anymore because we won’t let him, but we need to be together for that to happen.”

Dean smiled softly at him, staring at their joined hands. “Guess you’re right, but still, I was a jackass to you and I’m so sorry, Cas. I didn’t even stop to think how much you suffered in all of this, I was only worried about myself and Sam.”

“It’s okay, Dean. We can make things right, starting by this,” Cas shook their hands with a smile. Dean raised his eyes to meet Cas’s. “As long as we do it together.”

Dean nodded at him with a smile. “Together.”

**Author's Note:**

> As always, you can find me on [ tumblr](https://gii-heylittleangel.tumblr.com/)


End file.
